I write from a point in my life where sense has jumped out of the window. Nothing makes sense and rationale is an anomaly. As I ponder, through my thoughts, I wrestle with the thought of racism. Is it possible to live a life without some sort of personal racist tendencies? If I get upset as a black person at a white at times cracker may exhume from my lips. If a white dude gets mad at a black man nigger may come from his lips. Either way both have racist thoughts and actions that come forth in times of stress. That does mean it is right but it happens.

I just find it awkward to say the least to fit into to certain circles. I grew up in a black community. I went to a predominately white high school and then matriculated to a HBCU. (Historical Black College and University) I then played professional baseball with any and every culture you could imagine. I lived with these guys for 6 months out of a year. I then went in to the military where I meet Americans from around the nation. All that being said,

“Culture is a beast of a thing to try to change, so mostly you adapt.”

From a bias standpoint, I have a profound love for black people that is unequivocal to any other race. Is that racist, I do not know but it is true. I think we have been oppressed and played to levels of no proportions in America. We have been abused and then scoffed at when we have the audacity to defend ourselves. We have not formed counter terrorist militia to counteract the atrocities that have been done to us and are being done covertly. This is by no means a crutch but my observation of what has transpired in my life. The Civil Rights Movement was a powerful vehicle for change but the wheels seemed to have fallen off as off lately. Now we have the rights (kind of) but we have been some misinformed that we have started to believe the hype. So now the racism has been turn inward and now blacks fear other blacks as if they were the KKK.

AZ raps in Life’s a Bitch on Nas’ Illmatic, “A person’s status depends on salary…” and this has in a way becomes the moniker for most caught in the struggle. The struggle being that of trying to get out of a poverty stricken state that has handcuffed you to disenfranchisement. I have drawn weary of the intentional categorizing of blacks within the context of mediocrity, especially black males. Though many may not have a bank account that is reminiscent of easy street there is a work ethic that is laced in the very fabric of our being. Now, there are some exception to the rule but for the most part, more people are concerned about being honest, hard working and productive additions to society. But the fact of the matter is that many are underpaid but overworked. They have jobs that do not provide adequate health care which in the long run affects their job once again. Poverty become this vicious cycle that keeps perpetuating and hampering those got in the struggle.

So this angst grows and the racist tension widens due to the need for viable income. Everyone gets blamed for the others demise when in actuality it is the rich against the poor. The poor become lump into one group and the rich into another. Poor whites and black get lumped together as just poor people. When all is said and done, poverty is an equal opportunity employer that welcomes all. Go to any local job service and you will see that poverty has no color…..Just ruminating.